Why I use the phrase Embrace your Greatness

 

My tagline, mission, slogan, and brand of sorts is Embrace Your Greatness. I use it in hashtags on twitter, Facebook and Instagram. It’s my message to people everywhere but especially the lost, wounded, hurt, heartbroken, and in particularly young women. It is expressed on the back cover of my book Words of Inspiration, Sister to Sister: So Then I Learned. And while you can probably find those words anywhere. Just do a quick google search and it will come up in many places. And, you probably think you know what I mean with those words, I want to clarify my thought process behind my positive affirmation for you to Embrace Your Greatness.

You see before I started using it I had no idea it was such a used phrase. My usage of the phrase comes from two thought processes. One, as a professor, having taught many students I see too often how low self-worth and low confidence stunts the growth of our young people. Somewhere in their background, typically, their childhood they were told, you can’t, you are not capable, you are not the right color, or the right size or the right…and the list goes on and on. They are hardly ever told that they are good enough just as they are. This low self-worth manifest in their grades and behavior. They act out because they are seeking attention. They do poorly in school because they feel like what’s the use anyway and so the cycle of impoverished thinking continues.

As I began to see through these external actions to feel the internal self-loathing, I challenged myself to make a difference.   I challenged myself to be a positive influence in their lives. I started looking with my heart and not my eyes.  I challenged myself to look beyond statistics and stereotypes. I challenged myself to look beyond dreaded hair, gold top and bottom grills, pants hanging below the butt, Goth makeup, half naked bodies with beautiful young ladies baring their precious vessels so everyone can see, the profaned filthy expressions that comes from not knowing any other way to express themselves. I challenged myself to look beyond all of that and see the soul that God created. And behind the external armor of low self-worth is a beautiful soul that caused God to smile and say “it is good.”

Looking through his eyes of love and compassion for the human soul there is greatness in every soul that breathes. There is ability and capability. There is creativity and creative powers. There is powerful and prolific thought processes that can result in brilliant writers, authors, doctors, surgeons, pianist, musicians, athletes, activist, actors, humanitarians, entrepreneurs and so much more if someone took the time to look beyond the external and see the greatness that abides inside of us all.

Secondly, when we embrace our greatness we can clearly see greatness in others. For those of us that believe in Jesus Christ as our Lord, the scriptures says Greater is he that is in us than he that is in the world (1John 4:4). In this battle between good and evil. Greater came to overcome evil. And he showed himself mighty as he died a horrible death on the cross and rose again on the third day claiming victory over death and the grave. That Greater power left this physical world but not without leaving a gift behind. He promised to give his spirit to anyone that would accept it. If you are a believer then you have accepted the gift of his spirit and so in you and I resides the same power that he had. He is limitless and so are we. So when I say embrace your greatness to believers. I am asking you to embrace the Holy Spirit that lives inside of you. Know that there’s nothing you can’t accomplish. Know that all things are possible for you. Know that you have the greatest power that ever existed living inside of you. When this power is acknowledged there is nothing that can stop you from being the best you that you can possibly be. You and I will reach our destiny as long as we embrace our greatness!!

Allowing the gift of the Holy Spirit to reign in our lives through the reading of his letters to us (the bible) you will begin to see others through his loving eyes and heart of compassion. When we all look with those eyes and hearts we understand we are all united in one mission, to love each other as He loves each of us. This brings about a clarity that allows us to see clearly the greatness that’s in us all.

I love you with Christ love,   

Embrace your greatness and inspire someone today.

Who's validating you?

The question of validation is a relevant question. Maturity teaches us a lot about validation and being secure in one’s own worth.  I am a firm believer of when you learn, teach. These days I am much more secure in my own skin that I was, even 10 years ago. But this security, this wisdom came at a price and through experience. 

 

 I remember very clearly being young and insecure in my being, in my essence. Unsure of myself in many ways. Granted, in some ways I was over the top secure. People who knew me back in the day would say, but you were always confident. And yes, professionally, I was confident in my abilities and there was no stopping me. But personally and emotionally I was a mess. I was broken and heartbroken. Searching for love in all the wrong places. Even today I recognize it when I see it. So, I understand very clearly the purpose of my “going through” was so that I can relate to the signs and symptoms when I see them today. And truthfully, I am good with that. I am better than good, I am grateful! My stories provide inspiration for my sharing. My stories have encouraged many young women on their journey and for that I am grateful. And so if I had to do it all over again. I would.

 

 But, my heart aches and reaches out to those who are still in the grips and vices of needing others validation. Today, I see relationships being slaughtered because of the emotional shattering that needing and wanting validation from others can cause. I see young women giving up and never reaching their full potential because of their inability to see and embrace their greatness.

 

 What we don’t understand is just how much our present is affected by our past. Years ago someone that I cared about deeply told me very clearly that it was not his job to validate me. For the first time I really heard that statement and although it hurt I took it as it was meant. Simply the truth! Humans have a need to be validated by others. It starts from an early age. We want our parents to be pleased with us. We look up to grandparents, preachers, friends, teachers. Little girls need their dad’s approval and love. Little boys are just as needy if not more. Most of our lives are spent trying to please someone and so when it comes to relationships we look to them for validation and; unfortunately, some people are just not up to the task.  But, we have to ask ourselves, should they be? Should others validate us?

 

I think in loving relationships we nurture each other and feed each other with love and spiritual healing, but its shouldn’t be anyone’s responsibility to validate us. When we talk about validation we speak in terms of others substantiating our being. Others being the reason we live. Needing others endorsement to feel okay with our essence.  There is only one person that can substantiate your being and that is you. God already put his brand of approval and called his creation good. So who else do you need to say that you are good?

 

I encourage you today to embrace your greatness.   Embrace the very essence of who you were created to be. Stand in the mirror and smile at him/her and declare your victory. You are all the validation you need.  Your brand of approval is all that truly matters.  You came into this world alone and you will leave alone. Your character will be the legacy left behind. Take back your power and know that you are amazing just as you are. That is all the validation you need.

 

 

I honor your presence on this planet but you validate you,

With Much Love,

 

Tonya White Johnson

 

 

 

The Power of being a Woman by Michelle Mckinney Hammond

Why I am proud of an African American Lineage

 

 From the moment they came out with the term "African American" for people of color I have questioned the validity of  it as it pertains to me. I cannot lie,  initially I took offense to being called African, for I was not born in Africa.  The only insight of Africa I had been told was of an uneducated people walking around a poor country with hardly any clothes.

I never really thought about it,  I considered myself  just a person of color born in America, but as the years went by and I became older and wiser and I began to research my heritage I found that there is a true story of a magnificent people that has never been told, ironically it was left out of the history books.

Today I look in the mirror and I see a caramel colored female with slightly slanted eyes  a perfectly rounded nose and full luscious lips and I see an undeniable ethnic nationality looking back at me.

 I take a look at my Brothers and Sisters and I see rainbow of  colors, beautiful colors of pecan, caramel, brown, chocolate, beige, tan every different shade of brown you can imagine, what a vast array of colors our God has made.  I am proud to be an African American because that is what God made me.

If I close my eyes and listen real close I can almost hear the beat of the drums, the dance of the Mandinka Warriors or of the chants of the Ashanti tribe calling out to each other in a mystical voice understanding every word. They are dancing because they are happy, dancing because they are free, dancing and unashamed because they are made in God's image.

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 We were once a beautiful and proud nation, our ancestors are the magnificent and undisputed, gifted Egyptians of history, the Pharaohs of old, the builder of the pyramids,

the masters of mummification, the original surgeons,  they could cut a body open and close it back up and not a mark would be left to show the incision. Now that’s  intelligence.

The Africans came from this lineage, and even though thousands of my ancestors were taken from their homeland because of jealousy and greediness, and put into small holes aboard ships not fit to hold cargo, somehow they survived, although they were beaten and starved as they made that voyage across the Atlantic, my people strong-willed and  full of pride endured the hardships.

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Free men and women were taken from their country to be slaves to another, for 400 years they were considered to be property of another, although God made them free .  For 400 years they were enslaved, beaten, made to work from sunup to sundown, they were told they were nothing, treated even worse. 

But somehow they survived, they prayed to a God that they could not see, could not touch, but they prayed anyway and  they would sing and dance the tears away.

 There oppressors often wondered, what is it about these people that keeps them going, they would often peek around the corner at the shacks (if they could be called that)on the plantations far away from the big house, but close enough to monitor.  Their shacks were no more than a few sticks put together, they did not have the luxury of a concrete floor, or a wooden one for that matter.

In the summer it was scorching. In the winter it was freezing. They would sit around the fire at night and tell stories of their homeland, they would laugh and dance and pray, yes they would pray,  for  you see it was their belief in God that kept them going, they knew somehow, someway they would overcome. Their oppressors may have taken their freedom ,they may have even taken their children and loved ones but the one thing they could not take was their spirit, their will to survive.

My ancestors endured slavery, hatred, segregation, bigotry, murder by the hundreds, rape by the thousands, separation of love ones, absconded from their kids by force, never to be seen again. We were a nation of bastards, we were not born in America but bought to America by hate.

Thankfully by the grace of God, we have overcome and we are yet overcoming.  Once a people that were forbidden to read or write, once thought of as ignobles with no intelligence or capabilities of learning, we are now inventors, judges, lawyers, doctors, teachers, preachers, authors  and the list goes on and on. We are a people proud of our heritage, proud of who we are.

African American is not who I am but what I am, It is my heritage, my culture, my nationality, it does not matter to me whether I am called Negro, Black, Colored or African American, because my Nationality or the color of my skin does not define me, I am defined by my values, standards and beliefs.

I am a beautifully made creature, brought into existence by God himself, the possibilities are limitless. I am free to be whatever or whoever I choose to be. So why am I proud to be an African American, I'm proud because I was chosen by God to continue the legacy of a Rich and Beautiful Nation.   

             

 

How much are you worth?

 

$5, $10, $50 The auctioneer called, Do I have an offer,  going once, going twice, sold for $5 to the bachelor  number 1 in the front row with the top and bottom gold grill. The young, pretty girl with no self-esteem sat shyly smiling as he looked over and winked his eye and his gold teeth sparkled. For less than a McDonald’s value meal she had been bought and sold.     

 Daily young women are bought and sold for the price of a happy meal or movie. Never really understanding their importance. A vicious cycle begin to form at a young age and choices are made that debilitate their ability to think rationally.   

Knowing your value is important but knowing that you are of value is paramount.  We often get caught up in this game of life looking for love and we typically find it in all the wrong places. If you are searching for something diligently you will find it. The only question is to whom will you fall prey?

Knowing your value comes directly from knowing yourself, knowing your qualities, good and bad, standing face to face and toe to toe with yourself and facing the real you, the good, the bad and the ugly. Learning the character of your nature and living in the strength of it and not wallowing in its weakness. Accepting your weakness as they are but daring yourself to improve, daring yourself to beat the odds and overcome every obstacle in your way. 

Daring yourself to be the you, you were destined to be. How many of us are up for the challenge? The problem as I have come to understand it is, coming into the knowledge of who you are and your value requires work. You have to put in the work. You have to do the work. You have to come face to face with the demons of yesterday that stops you from moving forward today. You have to acknowledge and forgive to even make a step towards improvement. You have to ask yourself for forgiveness before you can forgive others. You have to put in the work.    

It has always baffled me that we are willing to work for someone else and draw a paycheck, often still not able to pay our bills but we never value ourselves enough to put in the work to liberate our hearts, minds and souls so that we can truly live a happy and free life, not bound by anyone or anything.

The question remains. How much are you worth and are you willing to put in the work to maintain your value?

When you learn teach someone else. Pass it on. Be a teacher.

I challenge you to #EmbraceyourGreatness! #inspiresomeonetoday

Tonya White Johnson  

Empowering Word for Today!

People may be in your life,  but that does not mean they are on your path or going in your direction. Allow them to walk in their own lane and you walk in yours. Embrace those that are on your path as they can always support your dreams and help you along the way. Love those that are not, as YOU can always support their dreams and help them along the way. Know that you right where you are supposed to be.  I had to go through something to come to this understanding, but I am grateful for “the going through.”

Have an amazing day !! Look for something exceptional in your path today! #embraceyourgreatness

 

All The BEST,

Tonya White Johnson

Hang on...it gets better!!!

There are so many things in life I want to accomplish. So many people I want to help and so many lives I want to impact. At the end of the day I just want people to know that somebody cares. That what you are going through matters to somebody.

I remember going through my stuff feeling like I was  the only one in the world going through. And when you are a strong woman you don't want to come off as being weak, so you choose not to call your friends , because they see you as this strong tower, and you can't let them down. So you bear the burden alone.

Sometimes I felt overwhelmed by it all and if not for my faith I am not sure how things would have turned out. So I know the pain. I know the heartbreak and I want you to know that this too shall pass. It gets better. Life gets better. The situation gets better. You just have to hang on in there to fight the battle another day.

You see, everyday you conquer, every day you overcome you are getting stronger. You are building your strength muscles. You are so much stronger than you feel. I promise you that you can handle. I promise you that you can come out on the other side. I promise you that it gets better.
Hang in there!!! It is always darkest just before the dawn.

Keep shining bright!! You will find your way!!

www.tonyawhitejohnson.com